FREAKING OUT!!

I feel time is flying by! I’m just about half way to the due date which scares me completely as I feel I have not made any progress on getting done what needs to be done for this baby. I have no nursery set up, I have no registry completed and I have no idea what I’m really getting myself in for. I’m sure this is completely normal but it is freaking me out and I feel that no one understands. I really like to be prepared ahead of time for any major event. I mean I had 2 years to plan my wedding and I still was freaking out that I wasn’t prepared. Well I guess in a way I had 2 years of my life to plan for this event however when your trying to get pregnant you really don’t go and buy baby furniture and register as then your family looks at you like you’re a nut case.

How does one ever really prepare for their life to change in unimaginable ways? I mean I know I need to get the basics, I need a daycare, a place for the child to sleep and some other random stuff and all I have so far is oh that’s right nothing!!! I have 4 months left before the earliest I could go and in my head 4 months is not long enough to get ready for this. I lie in bed thinking about how our guest bedroom how to be converted to a nursery and that means clearing out all the junk that has accumulated and actually put a closet system back in the closet. I think about how am I suppose to know how to change a diaper, I think about how can I possibly find a daycare that I can trust to love and protect my child 10 hours a day, I think about how is my relationship with John going to change and how do I protect it so it doesn’t. Pretty much I lie away at night freaking out.

How can I feel so ready and excited and yet so scared and unprepared at the same time? I just need to get through the holidays before I freak out too much as everyone I look to for advice and help has too much on their plates right now to help me stop freaking out.